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Not Strong Enough

Happy 2020! It has started off at a rapid pace. I am excited to see what this new year has in store!

One of the things I am looking forward to is having back surgery. Yes. Looking forward to it! While I am not anxious to go through the actual procedure, I can’t wait to be free from the limitations that my overuse has caused. While I didn’t realize it at the time, for far too long I have lifted things that were too heavy for me.

An incident comes to mind that brings me to spring a long time ago. We had put our heifers, (cows having their first calf), in the pasture behind the house where we could keep an eye on them. More often than not things go smoothly for these young mothers. Still, there are times when assistance is needed because of their inexperience giving birth and their small frame size.

Typically when a calf is born it slides onto the ground and the impact causes the amniotic sac to break. In this case, however, the membrane was extra thick so it to stayed in tact. I could see that the calf’s nose was completely covered by the sac and that he couldn’t breathe. I quietly slipped out and removed it as he lay struggling on the ground. Then, without thinking, I picked him up and tossed him onto a bale of straw that was near by. The impact startled him, causing him to take his first breath.

Rocks, haybales, motorcycles, and even my kayak are just a small part of my heavy things list. Sometimes the lifting is borne of necessity. That slippery 65 pound calf would have died without my help. Other times my actions haven’t been necessary at all. It would have been better to have left them undone.

My desire to please and to help when help is needed, often causes me to pick things up when I should let them lie. Stubbornness has also played a role. Impatience and the desire to get things done have been culprits too. A lack of awareness of what I was doing to my body as I worked has caused me to harm my spine. As I make preparations to undergo surgery I now realize, this can happen in the spiritual world too.

Unforgiveness is a crushing burden. Bitterness can be so heavy that it injures our heart. Holding on to words spoken against us instead of giving them to Jesus causes us pain. Worrying instead of trusting can make us feel responsible to fix everything. Bearing the weight of others’ behaviors and decisions is not what Jesus has for us.

So this year as I get my back repaired, I am asking Jesus to show me where my spirit needs healing too. That He help me be wise in those things that I choose to pick up, physically and spiritually as well. May He show me those things that come from Him, and help me to walk away from the rest. I pray that I will always remember to ask for His help, and from others when it is needed. I know I am simply not strong enough to carry all things on my own.

Psalm 28:7 KJV The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusted in him, and I am helped: therefore my heart greatly rejoiceth; and with my song will I praise him.

Ephesians 6:10 NKJV 10 Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might.

1 Chronicles 16:11 KJV 11  Seek the Lord and his strength, seek his face continually.

4 thoughts on “Not Strong Enough

  1. Oh Chris, I am sorry to hear of your pain and the need for surgery. We will pray for you – that all goes well and your body heals well.
    Your post is so wise and well written. Thanks for the Truth.
    Love & Hugs, Judy

    1. Thank you for the prayers and encouragement Judy!!!
      I am doing well while I wait to have the surgery scheduled as long as I don’t lift more than I should. (Pun intended) 🙂
      Love and Hugs Back to you.

  2. Please, tell me if there’s anything you need! I’d love to get together before the surgery if you’re up to it. I’m just like that in my need to do it myself, and more than I should. Praying that God will show me the things in my Spirit that I might also be trying to do myself. I am so grateful for you and appreciate your writing. Thanks again my friend. Hope to see you soon.

    1. Thank you Kim! Indeed, lets get together soon!

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